2022 turned out to be another challenging year for many people! How was it for you?
Last month I summarized my first two years of blogging and with the start of a new year; it’s time to take a different approach to being our best and beautiful selves. I’ll start with a review as to why I chose to stop making resolutions and instead, focus on a word to guide the year.
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People set resolutions with the best of intentions. However, statistics show that most resolutions are dropped after the first few months. I was no exception.
In 2017, instead of setting a resolution, I chose a word to guide my actions. That year the word was Intentional. After that, I chose Create, Rooted, Boundaries, Freedom, and Hope.
This year’s word is Agape. Agape is divine, unconditional love to be used freely. It is the closest unconditional love we can experience on this side of heaven – kind of like the love we get from dogs. We say that dogs are man’s best friends because they give unconditional love. (Did you ever notice that dog spelled backward is God?)
Yet giving this love to others and ourselves can be challenging in a world where it feels like negativity is so strong. We cannot give what we don’t receive. So I’ll share how important it is to treat ourselves well – and how to use the word “yet” to make that easier.
“Yet” helps us move from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset. For example, one might say “I’m not good at math.” This is a fixed mindset. Adding a “yet” promotes growth, i.e. “I’m not good at math, yet I can take a class to help me understand it.” If you’re struggling to build a business, how about “I’m not good at sales. Yet if I learn to accept that each “no” brings me closer to the next “yes” – I will make more sales.”
Two years ago I introduced Boundaries which has helped me immensely. The “ahas” I learned – combined with “yet” – make my relationships with others healthier. For example, I had difficulty saying “no” when asked to do something I really didn’t want to do. It’s hard to say no to people. Yet with Boundaries, I now can say “no” when it is the right answer.
“Yet” makes your brain think of what you can do versus what you can’t. It allows you to use the power of your mind to take you to where you want to go.
Clichés are another example of fixed mindsets. How often do you hear, “Do you want the good news or the bad news?” What if you changed the word bad to opportunity?
“Do you want the good news or the opportunity news?” Now you’re looking for solutions. (Scott and I made this change in our home years ago. It really does make a difference!
By using “yet,” and breaking out of clichés, we open ourselves to growth. As you can see from my past blogs, this is a continuing journey. I know there will be unexpected road blocks along the way. Therefore I continue to search for tools to help me take setbacks in stride and open more opportunities. My goal is to share everything I learn with you.
Recently, one of my life coach clients sent me a text about how much she has learned from me. Apparently, I come up in her conversations with others. While it feels good to work on my personal journey, it’s even better to pass this along to others. Next month I’ll have a quote that shows you how valuable others are in your life.
For now, understand that the past and the future are important. Think of the past as a rearview mirror in your car. You glance at it periodically to learn from it, but don’t dwell on it. The future is your windshield, but don’t use it to procrastinate by saying “I will get there or I am going to do this.” Living in the present is the gift. The present is where you are now and this is the time to change from a fixed to a growth mindset.
If you have a question or comments, call or text 480-684-2866. You can also contact me HERE. As much as I love to blog, I also love to listen.