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Can We Trust Even When Life Feels Scary?

I used to think that if I planned well enough, I could keep my life safe and steady. I thought being in control was the same as being happy. Life doesn’t always follow our plans. Lately, my world has felt like a storm. Between the deaths of five people, my son’s transition after prison, and my sister’s diagnosis with breast cancer, the ground has felt very shaky. I’ve learned that when the world is chaotic, I can’t control what happens outside. Instead, I am continuing on my journey as the “architect” of my own heart.

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When things feel overwhelming, we often find ourselves in a knot of Thoughts, Emotions, and Actions (T.E.A.). Our thoughts try to anticipate the “what-ifs,” emotions feel heavy, and actions become frantic as we try to fix things we cannot control. Being an architect isn’t about stopping the storm. It’s about building a strong, safe house inside ourselves so we can stay standing while the wind blows. 

I can’t change a medical diagnosis or a legal situation; however, I can choose how I show up for myself and the people I love.

Trusting isn’t about knowing exactly how things will turn out. It’s about knowing that I have the strength to handle whatever happens next. It’s about being kind to myself, setting boundaries that protect my heart, and finding peace in the middle of the mess.

It is why I wrote my 4-week course.  If you are going through a hard season and feel like you’re losing your footing, I want to help. My T.E.A. Course is a place to learn to untangle our thoughts, emotions, and actions to find your calm again. I’d love for you to join the healing journey.

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This June will mark the 3-year anniversary of my first Boundaries class. Because this class impacted me in such a positive way, I wanted to give something back and became a facilitator with Don. Two weeks ago I mentioned how my sister Tammy – who has emerged on her own after a 30-year marriage – is now a third facilitator. She’s also put her talents to work by updating the Boundaries workbook given with the class.

And I saw an opportunity.

I decided to go through the updated version as though I was reading this information for the first time. I wanted to evaluate where I am now with practicing my “ahas” after three years. For those of you who have been following my blogs, you have read about these “ahas” before. But if you’re new or want to review them, click here to find out what they are and how they helped me.

I can’t believe the difference! I love the changes in myself and the relationships I now enjoy.  Believe me, it hasn’t been without hardships and I will talk more about this next week. What I’m saying today is that Boundaries is not a one-shot class where you get it or you don’t.  I know people hesitate to do something like this because they fear there will be a ‘let down’ once the class is over.  

Yet I still practice my “ahas” and I just finished going through “Beyond Boundaries”, a book I’ve had for over a year but didn’t get around to.  Tammy is also reading it. Now we’re working with Don and plan to add a “Beyond Boundaries” class for those who attended Boundaries at least once. This is a 6-week class and the goal is to continue to support everyone who wants to improve their self-worth and enrich their relationships.

With the expansion of classes, we believe it’s our best way to not only help others make changes…but to make them permanent. We know that setting boundaries is an on-going process and our goal is to support and encourage our students as they transition to the people they want to be. 

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